Saying “NO”

How hard can it be? 

It's only a two letter word, yet it is so uncomfortable for some people.

The word is NO and it seems so difficult to say, but it's really important to learn, if you want self respect and freedom.

Saying no is a basic human right.

People seem to wait until it's too late to avoid the discomfort of saying no.

If you make yourself clear ahead of time, letting it be known for instance, you don't go out weeknights, you aren't available to baby sit on weekends, you don't loan money...etc...there won't be as many situations to make you feel stressed, guilty or fearful. 

The other issue that we see, is this unnecessary need to explain yourself.

Instead of just saying a definite "No,"people try to explain the "No" and that just makes everything worse.

When you are busy explaining yourself, you personify uneasiness and you look like you're desperate, looking for any nod of approval, rambling on with unnecessary half apologies.

Saying "No" means sometimes people are going to be disappointed and upset with you. 

Honestly, that’s their problem.

But it’s ok, allow them the right to be upset and allow yourself the right to say no, instead of making promises you don't really want to make.

All this saying “no” business may be uncomfortable and you may even feel guilty, perhaps that's why people give in as soon as they feel uncomfortable guilt.

Allowing the uncomfortable to weaken you sends unsteady and unstable messages to everyone, including yourself.   

So, feel the guilt, be uncomfortable, experience it. 

You'll discover that the more you do it the easier it gets, and when you do say yes, the yes carries a lot more meaning.

Suggestions for Saying No.

Be direct, “no, I can’t” or “no, I don’t want to.”

Don’t apologize or feel you need to explain yourself.

Don’t lie. Lying will make you feel guilty—and you don't want to feel guilty.

Remember that it is better to say no now than to resent it later.

Have good manners,“Thanks for asking.”

Don’t tell people “You'll think about it” if you don’t want to do it. 

Remember that your self-worth does not depend on others.

We don't have to be all things to all people.

So, there it is.

If you are struggling with this issue, hope this post was helpful.

Besides, saying “NO” is a great protection spell.

It’s a New Moon Friday

The new moon is one of the most powerful lunar energies we can benefit from.

There are many who believe it's as powerful as the full moon.  

The new moon is about  hope, new beginnings, the creation of intentions. 

It’s a great time to make changes in our lives if necessary.

Protect Your Front Door

 

Conquering Depression

Again we encourage everyone to get reacquainted with nature. When we reconnect with nature we reconnect with ourselves, that's where our strength comes from.

From Power of Positivity we read:

From Even though we live in a concrete world, we can all find a patch of greenery nearby to clear our minds and refresh our souls. We lead busier lives than ever, but that doesn’t mean we should neglect our basic needs, one of which is breathing fresh air and connecting with the Earth.

According to a study published by the National Academy of Sciences of the USA, people today spend 25% less time outdoors than they did 20 years ago. It comes as no surprise that rates of anxiety and depression continue to rise as we move farther and farther away from the way nature intended for us to live.

Walking in nature doesn’t just give us a break from the hectic city life; it can actually change our brain chemistry, too. 

HERE’S HOW SPENDING TIME IN NATURE EVERY DAY CAN REDUCE STRESS AND ANXIETY:

It’s no surprise that living farther away from nature surrounded by buildings and city noise can increase your risk of anxiety and depression, but spending time in even the smallest patch of land can do wonders for the brain.

New research out of Stanford University found that spending time in nature can actually alter the chemistry in your brain, leading to mental clarity and peace of mind, and alleviating anxiety and stress. As Gretchen Reynolds explains in the New York Times, graduate student Gregory Bratman, who attends Emmett Interdisciplinary Program in Environment and Resources at Stanford, analyzed the brains of 38 adult city slickers who went on a 90-minute nature hike. Bratman found that these individuals had lower brain activity in their subgenual prefrontal cortex, a part of the brain that focuses on “morbid rumination,” than the participants who trekked along the side of a nearby highway.Those who spent time in nature at least once a day didn’t dwell on the negative happenings in their lives as much, Reynolds reported. These results suggest what many of us probably knew all along – that everyone can benefit from spending more time in nature, and less time in the concrete jungle.

Nature can do wonders for your mental health, so if you have neglected your time with Earth lately, here are a few more reasons to hit the trails again that we didn’t mention before.

1. NATURE CAN BOOST YOUR ENERGY LEVELS.

After spending time outside, have you ever noticed that you feel more lively, cheerful, and refreshed? Well, there’s actually a scientific reason behind that. Several studies have confirmed that spending time in nature increases vitality, and the research finds that just 20 minutes a day out in nature can significantly boost energy levels. Richard Ryan, lead author of the scientific studies mentioned above and a professor of psychology at the University of Rochester, says, “We have a natural connection with living things. Nature is something within which we flourish, so having it be more a part of our lives is critical, especially when we live and work in built environments.”

2. NATURE CAN MAKE YOU MORE CREATIVE.

A study published in the journal PLOSone indicated that immersion in nature can boost creativity by as much as 50%! Participants in the study had to spend four to six days in nature, completely disconnected from all technology. Psychologists explained that because of the gentle, more relaxing stimuli in nature, people’s attentional system becomes rejuvenated and able to function correctly, whereas in modern society, we constantly have to switch between tasks and become bombarded with loud, sudden noises.

If you have been struggling to bring out your creative energy, try spending more time in nature!

3. NATURE ELIMINATES STRESS.

Numerous studies have found that time spent outside can greatly reduce stress. For example, a study published in 2012 in the journal Landscape and Urban Planning revealed that out of 25 healthy adults living in Scotland, those who lived in areas with the most greenery had lower levels of cortisol.

Stress can increase your risk of mental and physical illnesses, but among all remedies, nature is one of the easiest ways to heal the mind and recharge the soul.

4. NATURE CAN IMPROVE DEMENTIA SYMPTOMS.

Along with all the other benefits of nature, a bit of greenery can go a long way in helping those who suffer from dementia. Researchers at the University of Exeter Medical School discovered that when gardens were placed in nursing homes, the patients showed less agitation, more relaxation, and appeared to be more stimulated mentally.